


shattered glass, fallen fast (leave me paralyzed)

by xuxisquish



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Bartender Jisung, Boys Kissing, Drinking, Enemies to Lovers, Holding Hands, M/M, Na Jaemin is Whipped, Racing, chenle's hair matches his boat idk it's cute, cockblocking. twice, jaemin is blunt, jaemin matures halfway through this, noren if you squint, you've heard of street racers now get ready for boat racing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:01:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25046563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xuxisquish/pseuds/xuxisquish
Summary: in which jaemin is the king of the river until chenle comes along with his fancy boat and pretty smile, and maybe jaemin has a thing for fancy boats and pretty smiles.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno, Na Jaemin/Zhong Chen Le
Comments: 27
Kudos: 71





	shattered glass, fallen fast (leave me paralyzed)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> this fic is a birthday gift for k (jaemleist on twitter), a person i cherish very much :D (yes, this is like two weeks late. i'm SORRY i thought it would be like. 5k max. oopsies.) so yeah! i love u very much k and i hope you enjoy!!! this is for u :D
> 
> ALSO ALSO i have to thank my betas of course!!! thank you ace and soda for putting up with my rambling!!!
> 
> anyways that is all, i will shut up now, happy reading :P

Na Jaemin hated losing. 

It made him furious, it made his blood boil and his hands curl into tight fists that ached to knock into something, or someone. He usually didn’t have any problem with it, though, since he was the best. He didn’t lose. Usually.

See, he _was_ the king of the river. Until Zhong Chenle showed up, with his stupid fluorescent Mastercraft brand boat, stupid enhanced engine, and even stupider smile.

It was one of those nights again, where he crossed the invisible line marked by two stolen buoys, teeth gritted, right hand pressing down the speed lever like his life depended on it, the other one gripping the wheel so tight his knuckles were white. And a good few yards behind the bright orange Mastercraft. Jaemin’s brows furrowed as he shifted to neutral gear, the loud roar of his engine lowering to a softer noise. He stared up ahead at the darkened water, and he clenched his jaw when he laid eyes on his competitor’s boat . The spotlights were on now, and Jaemin could see the pilot with flaming orange hair (matching his boat, for fuck’s sake), standing in front of the driver's seat and tapping a lazy finger against the wheel, _smirking_ at him. Jaemin gave him a graceful middle finger, then pivoted to glare at the boy beside him.

“Hey!” Renjun exclaimed from the passenger seat, lifting his flattened palms in the air, as if to claim innocence. “I didn’t do anything. I’m not the pilot here . Zhong beat your ass again and that’s on _you_.”

Jaemin scoffed, pulling sharply at the wheel and flipping his boat around, waves sloshing around, ready to head back to the docks and to drink away the bitterness of defeat that had lodged itself in his mouth. Except clearly a certain someone had other plans for him, because there he was right now, that infuriating orange Mastercraft and its matching idiot pilot, grinning at him with a shit eating smile. Jaemin didn’t even bother swallowing down his groan. “What do you want, Zhong?”

“Aren’t you tired of eating my waves, Na? I really thought you’d step up your game today.” The orange-haired boy shrugged. “Guess not, though.” He looked Jaemin’s boat up and down condescendingly.

“I wasn’t feeling my best tonight,” Jaemin muttered behind clenched teeth.

“Excuses? That’s cute,” Zhong Chenle’s copilot, a boy with a bright smile that Jaemin recognized as Liu Yangyang, intervened. 

“Oh yeah?” Jaemin raised a brow. The co-pilot was getting brave. “Take the wheel, then . Let’s go again, first back to the docks wins the night.”

“That’s unsafe, there might be more boats coming, just admit that I won, Na.” the orange-haired boy commented. As a matter of fact, there was another trio of vehicles speeding past the end buoys right as he finished his sentence.

“Shut it, Zhong,” Jaemin snapped, and only received another one of those infuriating smirks in reply.

“Or what?” Chenle drawled, walking away from the driver’s seat and leaning over the left side of the split windshield, making Yangyang scramble to hold the wheel upright. “I beat you tonight. But, last I checked, you were supposed to be king of the river. " Chenle said, tilting his head slightly, and Jaemin felt his blood start to boil at the sight of him alone. "Honestly, I'm a bit disappointed."

"I _said_ today wasn’t my best night," the pink-haired boy replied, rolling his eyes. That was a lie. Chenle seemed to know that, too, but he didn't comment.

"Am I seeing you again tomorrow, then? Maybe you can show us why they call you king of the river." There was that small smirk on his lips again, and Jaemin felt his cheeks heat up, in anger, of course.

"For the race, Zhong?” He shot back,“Or because you can't get enough of my handsome face?" It accidentally came out flirty, and that wasn't exactly Jaemin's intention at first, but he noticed the way Chenle’s cheeks reddened slightly and he couldn’t help the bubble of pride that swelled in his chest.

Chenle’s blush disappeared after a moment, and he quickly regained his composure. Yangyang let out a snort, and the driver himself simply shrugged. "Mhm. I can't get enough of your handsome face when you pass the finish line. Behind me."

Jaemin's head was starting to ache because of how hard he was clenching his jaw. This boy was infuriating.

"Don't get cocky, Zhong," he warned. "It was a one-time thing."

"Hm, I guess we'll see about that, _king of the river_."

And with a wink--a wink, for fuck's sake-- Chenle pressed down the speed lever and his boat took off. There was an almost over the top roar that came from his enhanced Ferrari engine, and then he was off, disappearing into the night as he headed back to the docks, probably to celebrate his victory.

Jaemin angrily brought his fist down on the wheel. Renjun barely looked up at the noise. "Fuck him," Jaemin mumbled through gritted teeth, face painted in displeasure.

"Yeah, I'm sure you'd love that," Renjun quipped, leaning back lazily in the passenger seat, evidently unbothered by the pilot's fury.

Eyes wide at the suggestion that he found Chenle attractive enough to even consider doing such a thing, Jaemin's head snapped towards him. "I wouldn't," He said firmly, eyes boring into the side of Renjun’s head.

With a prominent roll of his eyes, Renjun stared ahead, and Jaemin wordlessly shifted out of neutral, his boat's nose pointed towards the docks, a few hundred meters in the distance. "You definitely would. There’s some tension between you two that seriously needs to be cleared up."

"We absolutely do not," the other boy snapped, clicking his tongue. Chenle was an annoying prick that didn't deserve the win he got tonight. There was no way Jaemin was attracted to him. Nope.

Renjun shrugged. "Fine. Stay in denial, see where that leads you."

"I'm not in de--" Jaemin started, but then interrupted himself. Arguing with Renjun was useless, especially on subjects like this. It was better to just let it go, he convinced himself, even though there was still a great deal of fire pent up inside him. He forced his fingers to relax around the wheel, focused on the night breeze ruffling his pink hair and the reassuring sound of the cockpit of his boat gliding over the calm river waters. He couldn't let a little incident like this ruin his evening. The next day, he would get into his boat between the starting buoys, feel the rumbling of his engine under him, smell the victory in the air.

"I’ll kick his ass tomorrow, " Jaemin said, ending the conversation there. It was quiet on the boat, and remained that way until they reached the docks .

-

"Are you staying for the after-party?" Renjun asked, leaning against a post, as Jaemin finished sealing the inside of his boat with the matching protective cover.

Jaemin stepped back, admiring his work. Even after a year of use, his boat was practically as good as new, not a single scratch on the hull, the bright blue flame stickers that still gleamed under light. The customized Baja was his baby, the thing he valued most, the thing he'd spent the most effort on. It was why he took so much pride in his title as king of the river. Because all the tuning, all the decorating, all the engine enhancing... He'd done it himself. The success belonged to him and him only, the endless work done by his own hands. So, obviously, when a certain orange-haired bastard strolled in with a Mastercraft Xstar stuffed with a Ferrari engine and tried to take away from him the title he'd worked so hard for... He was bound to be angry. 

"Jaem? Earth to Jaemin?" His thoughts were interrupted by Renjun's voice, and he realized his copilot was still waiting for an answer.

"Nah, not tonight," he said, walking away from his boat, shooting the moorings a last glance to make sure it was docked properly. He clapped Renjun on the shoulder, and the boy fell in step beside him, gravel crunching under their feet as they walked off the dock. "I'm not feeling it."

"You mean you lost, and now you're embarrassed to show your face," Renjun deadpanned. "Come on, Jaem, it's only eleven o'clock."

"No, Renjun." Jaemin was annoyed, now. Not everything had to be about stupid Chenle. "I'm exhausted and I don't feel like attending the same boring after-party they hold after every single race. Is that a good enough reason for you?"

"Fine, geez," the black-haired boy answered, lifting his hands up in the air. "But you’re sure? You won’t even come for a drink?"

"Nope. I think I’ll just crash as soon as I get home."

Renjun winced. "Make sure you sleep in your own bed, this time," he suggested, referring to the time Jaemin had accidentally slept in Renjun's bed and drooled all over his pillow.

"That was _one_ time," Jaemin scoffed.

He got a raised eyebrow in answer. "If you say so." His roommate shrugged. "Well, I guess I’m staying here for the next few hours."

Jaemin's eyes narrowed. "You hate drinking."

"So?" Renjun refused to meet his eyes and feigned innocence.

"These parties are the lamest thing ever, except for the booze, and you don’t drink. Why are you staying," he demanded, more of an order than a question, and Renjun sighed.

"Fine. There might be someone..." 

Jaemin gave him a suggestive eyebrow raise. "Oh? And do I know this someone? "

"Maybe." Renjun's mouth quirked upwards. "He's a pilot, too."

"And what is the name?" Jaemin asked, a curious spark in his eyes.

"Jeno," Renjun said, and Jaemin didn't miss the blush that bloomed on his cheeks. "Lee Jeno."

"Oh, Jeno. I know him. He's not too bad. Could use some work on turns, though. How did the two of you meet?"

His roommate shrugged. "I bumped into him at the park three days ago. I recognized him, he recognized me, we had a chat. It was nice. He's super sweet. And he's pretty, too, like, _so_ pretty..."

"Gross," Jaemin interrupted, wrinkling his nose in mock disgust. "I don't want to hear it. Have fun with your boy, I'm heading back home."

Renjun huffed, bringing up a hand to ruffle his hair. "Fine. Drive safe."

"I'm a racer, Renjun. I never do," Jaemin said with a wink.

"You could just agree and leave," Renjun scoffed, stopping the brisk pace they were both walking at.

"Fine. I'll drive safe, just for you. Thank you for your concern." Jaemin blew him a kiss over his shoulder as he walked towards the parking. "See you later!"

"Later," he heard Renjun mumble as he turned away.

He found his car easily. Contrary to his boat, it was in a pitiful state. So dirty it was hard to see what colour it was and almost completely covered in bumps and scratches, he'd gotten it second hand for a few thousand bucks only. It worked fine. Just took a little fiddling with to get going. He was doing just that, twisting his keys over and over again, waiting for the engine to start, sighing in disappointment, he sat back with a thud against the driver's seat, but when he looked up, he regretted it immediately.

A few meters from him, surrounded by a small crowd of people, was Zhong Chenle. He had a beer in hand and a big smile on his face, interacting with the group that had formed around him, clapping people on their shoulders, nodding at them, laughing with them. He looked ridiculous, Jaemin thought. Absolutely moronic. He wanted to smash that stupid smiling face of his on the concrete beneath his feet.

With a particularly vigorous twist of his hand, the engine sputtered to life. Jaemin sighed in relief. He looked away from the boy and his bright-coloured hair and switched his focus to backing out of his parking spot, scanning the darkness through the rear window for any movement. He pivoted slowly, nearly slamming into another car. He wasn't nearly as good at driving a car as he was a boat, to his eternal embarrassment. Chewing on his lower lip, he left the parking lot, his engine emitting questionable noises, but not before shooting a look to his rearview mirror and meeting a pair of shining eyes staring right at him from beneath a mop of orange hair.

-

Tonight was the night, Jaemin thought as he stood in front of his boat, hands on his hips, chin high.

The wind felt right. The water looked right. Everything was right. Tonight was the night he regained his title.

"Come on, Jaemin, we’ve only got three minutes to start," Renjun told him, crouched in front of a knot, ready to unmoor the white and blue Baja from the dock. 

Jaemin wordlessly stepped on deck, slipped behind the wheel and ran his fingers along the smooth leather. "Ready," Renjun called, from the dock, and Jaemin nodded, starting the engine as his roommate undid the ropes knotted over the moorings and threw them on board. He pushed the nose of the boat away from land and strode to the back to hop on the platform as Jaemin drove away from the docks and towards the starting line, a few dozen meters away.

There were already a few boats lined up at the start , and Jaemin spotted Lee Jeno, the boy Renjun mentioned the day before, standing behind the wheel in his blue-and-yellow Baja. He spotted them and gave Jaemin's copilot a friendly wave, followed by a smile so bright Jaemin could see from where he was that his eyes were scrunched up in half moons. Renjun had been right, he did seem sweet. 

"A minute to start," someone on the referee boat announced through a speakerphone, and Jaemin shifted his gear so that his boat would glide along the current, slowly, to the starting buoys right in time for the horn.

But suddenly there was a loud roar behind him, and Jaemin's fingers tightened around the wheel. He knew that disgusting engine noise, but for some reason he was still surprised to see Chenle pull up between him and another boat. Jaemin frowned. There was something different. His Mastercraft wasn't orange anymore, it'd somehow been painted neon green since the last time he saw it. And that wasn't the only thing. Jaemin snorted. Chenle's hair was green, too. The exact same hue as his boat. His poor scalp. 

How childish, Jaemin thought, but there was a part of him that had to admit the pilot did look good with that colour. He mentally slapped himself. That part of him was wrong, clearly. Chenle gave him a wink, and Jaemin flipped him off. Idiot.

"Thirty seconds to start," the announcer said, and Jaemin tore his eyes away from the green-haired boy to stare ahead at the black water, coloured lights splattered along the river, flashing red and green, marking the course for the racers .

Jaemin breathed in, out, his hand ready atop the speed lever, inhaling the humid air. Tonight was the night, he reminded himself. Victory was the only option.

"Racers ready," the referee announced, and Jaemin's brows lowered, his face morphing into a focused frown. "Three." His heartbeat drowned out every other sound. "Two." He gripped the speed lever tight, he bit down on his tongue and sent half a glance at the other racers. "One."

And they were off.

The ground vibrated under Jaemin’s feet as he pushed down the lever, wind hitting his face as the Baja lurched forwards with a roar, leaving the other boats in the dust. Starts had always been his strong suit. Jaemin inhaled, hands tight around the wheel. The speed felt heavenly.

He gritted his teeth as he made the first turn, way ahead of everyone, the left side of his boat nearly scraping alongside the green buoy. It wasn’t a tight fit or anything, he just wanted to gain as much of a headstart as was possible . Another turn, wider this time, and he gave himself a little slack, fiddling with the speed to sink his rear into the water and trouble the waters for all the racers behind him. There was a long, straight dash now, and he heard Renjun whoop beside him, hair flying out of his face as Jaemin sped through the darkened water, small waves making his vehicle jump slightly, his legs keeping him balanced, accustomed to the frequent little bumps.

There was a boat on his tail, which he supposed was Chenle, and a few select others further behind. A turn right, a turn left. He was still ahead. He could almost taste the victory, the cool water that splashed against his face felt thick with it. Lying straight ahead, in the form of two buoys, was the finish line. It was marked with a referee boat and behind, he could see a small crowd gathered on the shore to watch. He was so close. Tonight was the night, he’d said. 

He’d been wrong.

Barely ten metres from the finish line, he saw a flash of neon green in his peripheral vision, and, before he knew it, it was too late. Chenle’s boat dashed ahead. Jaemin watched helplessly as he crossed the buoys before him. Again.

Jaemin completed the course barely a second later. But a second later was too late. 

The green-haired boy, basking in the howls and cheers of the crowd, didn’t even spare him a look as he waited for all the boats to finish so he could head back to the docks. Someone was saying his name. Probably Renjun. Jaemin couldn’t hear him. He felt like he was underwater, all sights and sounds blurred, except for that _fucking_ green-haired boy. 

“Jaemin?” Renjun asked again, and this time the pilot’s head turned to him.

“What?” he said quietly, his tone murderous and his eyes dark as he watched the water, slowly maneuvering so his boat faced the end of the course. 

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” he said with a wide smile. “I’m perfectly fine. It’s just a loss. Nothing we haven’t seen before.”

Renjun eyed him suspiciously, like he didn’t believe him one bit, but didn’t push further. “Alright then. There are two boats that haven’t crossed yet, so wait a bit before heading back.”

Jaemin nodded. Waited. The two boats didn’t come.

“I think there’s been a collision,” Renjun mumbled. He looked unnaturally nervous and Jaemin wondered why. Accidents happened often. Speedboating was extremely dangerous, especially at night time. 

“Jeno was in one of those boats,” Renjun added quietly.

“Oh.” Jaemin said as realisation dawned on him, he scratched the back of his head, biting his lip nervously. 

“He’s fine,” Renjun said , as though trying to convince himself, drumming his fingers over the rim of the windshield. “They had safety boats. He’s fine.”

“Do you want me to go check?” Jaemin asked, though he already knew the answer.

“No, it’s dangerous. We can’t go see until we know exactly what happened. Wouldn’t want to crash into anyone.” He added a nervous laugh after, for good measure, though it didn’t convince anyone.

“Okay. Let’s wait.”

They stayed quiet for a bit, scanning the course for any movement aside from the small waves, and Jaemin could see the other pilots were doing the same. The tension in the air was palpable. Every pilot was aware of the dangers of racing, but whenever something did go wrong, it put everyone on edge. Then, a woman in the referee boat spoke up through her loudspeaker. “There’s been a collision. The four racers involved in the crash are safe. The two boats are being towed back to the docks, so be careful as you head back.”

Jaemin pivoted in his seat to watch Renjun exhale in relief, hands braced on the windshield and head hanging between his shoulders. “Let’s go back, yeah?” Jaemin asked gently, and Renjun nodded, so he pressed down slowly on the speed lever and passed back through the finish line at moderate speed, the other racers trailing behind him.

“Renjun, spot me,” he commanded after a second, and his copilot nodded, reaching for the flashlight behind his seat and lighting up the water in front of him so they could be extra cautious. 

It was quieter than usual when they made it to the docks. Everyone was whispering, paying no heed to the racers docking their boats, grouped around something Jaemin couldn’t see.

Renjun made quick work of the moorings, then rushed towards the crowd of people, leaving the pink-haired boy to cover up the boat by himself. Jaemin didn’t mind. He knew his roommate was worried sick.

He didn’t rush, clipping the cover at the right places, making sure everything was alright, before stepping off his boat and strolling to the group. He elbowed his way to the center, and couldn’t stop the small gasp that escaped his lips.

There were four people on the ground, Jeno, his copilot, and two women Jaemin recognized as pilot Ryujin and her partner Yeji. The latter was wincing and clutching her arm, which seemed bruised, and there were a few cuts on Jeno’s face, but, aside from that, all of them seemed fine.

“We got lucky,” Jeno’s copilot was mumbling, and Jeno nodded in agreement. “We’re fine, guys,” he then said to the crowd, and there seemed to be a collective gasp of relief.   
  


But suddenly, there was a figure detaching itself from the crowd, and Jaemin could only watch as Renjun tumbled into Jeno’s arms.

“Idiot,” he said, sniffling into the other boy’s shirt, and Jeno, who seemed surprised at first, smiled softly before wrapping his arms around Renjun. The scene was too personal, and Jaemin’s cheeks heated up as he looked away, an action mirrored by most of the gathered crowd, he felt as though he’d seen something he shouldn’t have. 

“You’re alive,” someone in the crowd shouted. “Cheers, bro.” And accompanied by a rumble of laughter from the crowd, they stepped on a table and started chugging a can of beer. Jaemin sighed. Of course, the party wouldn’t halt because of a collision. Worse, even, every person at the docks, and especially racers, would most certainly be eager to dance and drink away the stress caused by the accident. Jaemin included.

He made his way to the makeshift bar built in an old tourist stall, and the boy behind the counter gave him a wink, pushing his brownish pink locks away from his eyes. “Well, if it isn’t the king of the river.”

Jaemin winced at the title. It wasn’t his anymore. And just like that his relatively good mood crumbled to nothing. Race. Second place. Chenle. “Didn’t you see the results?” he asked with a bitter smile, leaning his forearms on the counter because of the lack of seats. 

“Of the race?” the pseudo-barista pushed a glass in front of Jaemin and started filling it with the pink-haired boy’s favourite, not too strong but good enough to make his head spin a bit.

“Yeah, what else?” Jaemin knocked the drink back and brought it back down to meet the other boy’s eyes.

“I saw the results. Doesn’t matter to me,” he declared, reaching forward to punch Jaemin’s shoulder playfully. “To me, you’ll always be the king of the river, Jaem.”

Those words made him feel strangely warm inside. He grinned, a real one, this time. “Oh, Jisung. You’re too nice to me.” His smile turned teasing. “And while you’re at it… would you pour me another drink? On the house, if you would be so kind?”

Jisung rolled his eyes at the racer’s puppy eyes. “This is the last one you’re getting for free. I don’t want to get fired.”

“You’re not even old enough to drink,” Jaemin laughed as the boy filled up his glass, then gave him a glare.

“I’m doing this for the money. I literally hate alcohol, anyways.” The taller boy frowned when he noticed Jaemin’s mocking stare. “Also I’ll be major in less than a year, give me a break.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry. Thank you for the drinks, Sung,” he drawled in answer, and Jisung didn’t have time to react when Jaemin grabbed his face, pulled him forwards and placed a wet kiss on his cheek.

“Ew.” He wiped at his cheek, a disgusted look on his face. “You’re lucky I love you.”

Jaemin drained the last drops in his glass before pushing himself away from the counter, blowing Jisung a kiss. “Whew,” he whispered to himself when the universe blurred a bit. Maybe he’d overdone it a little. One of those drinks was usually enough to get him quite tipsy. He shouldn’t have chugged both of them in such a short span of time. Blinking to clear his vision, he made his way to the open space between the docks and the boat hangars, where a crowd of people were dancing to loud music blaring from a few speakers that had been scattered around. 

Jaemin danced for a bit, letting himself loosen up, swaying to the beat with complete strangers surrounding him. He wondered where Renjun was for a second, but then the whole scene with Jeno flashed in his mind and he remembered his roommate was in good hands. When he found it hard to breathe and felt a bit smothered by the heat of people around him, he elbowed his way out of the crowd, making his way to a calmer area to take a few deep breaths.

He found a small, rusted bench and slumped down on it, grunting at theimpact of his tailbone on the hard material. He stayed there for a bit, eyes lost in the flurry of people, bobbing his head lightly to the music, drumming his fingers on his thigh. It wasn’t long before he found his breath and felt his blood thrumming with the beat, ready to go back, get a few more drinks, and dance the night away, but a sudden movement caught his attention.

There was a figure detaching itself from the crowd, waving goodbye to a few people who kept dancing, and started walking… towards him. Jaemin furrowed his eyebrows. He couldn’t see their face clearly because of the fluorescent lights, and, from their gait, he was sure it wasn’t Renjun or Jisung. So who was it?

“Did your second defeat in a row tire you out?”

Jaemin’s heart dropped to his feet. Zhong Chenle was standing in front of him, hands on his hips, looking down at the other boy with the same infuriating grin. “What the fuck do you want?” he snapped, his voice cold and level. 

Chenle stepped closer, tilted his head, as if to look at the other racer better. “Just wanted to pay you a visit. Have a little after-race chat.” Jaemin didn’t know if it was the haze the drinks put him in, or if he was going crazy, but, _damn_ , Chenle looked good. His green hair was ruffled and the red on his cheeks was visible even in the near-darkness. He looked out of breath, too, and that goddamn _smirk_ \--

“I hate you, Zhong,” Jaemin declared, looking up into the other boy’s eyes, and finding nothing but amusement.

“Oh yeah?” Chenle leaned forwards to brace himself on the bench armrests, both hands either side of Jaemin, and the pink-haired boy’s breath hitched. There were only a few centimeters separating their faces, and he was pretty sure he could count Chenle’s eyelashes. “If you hate me so much, Na,” he whispered, his breath hot on Jaemin’s lips, “then why are you looking at me like you want to kiss me?”

Jaemin watched the other boy’s eyes flick to his mouth as he licked his lips. He smirked. “Those statements aren’t mutually exclusive.”

“No?” Chenle leaned in even closer, and Jaemin’s heartbeat sped up. He was pretty sure if he moved a millimeter closer their lips would touch. “Guess I can do something about that, then.”

Jaemin was almost jumping in impatience, wanted to close the space between them himself-- 

“Jaem!”

The pink-haired boy closed his eyes, exasperated, and let out a sigh as Chenle pulled away brutally, leaving a cold emptiness in his wake. Jaemin turned his head to the side to greet Renjun.

“Hey, man, I’m a little busy-- Oh my gosh, Renjun, are you okay?”

Jaemin had failed to recognize the shakiness in his roommate's voice when he called his name, but he could now see the distress on the boy’s face and the tears pooling in his eyes. “Jaem,” he called again, and this time his voice cracked on the syllable like a wave broke over the shore. Jaemin felt like he’d just received an ice cold bucket of water. He stood up, ignoring the green-haired racer that had stepped aside with a concerned look on his face, and rushed to his friend. “Renjun, what’s wrong? Did anything happen?”

Renjun took in a shallow breath, then slowly lifted up his phone, screen facing Jaemin, his hand shaking slightly. Jaemin saw the contact name and didn’t even have to read the text to know what happened. Just Renjun’s mom being inconsiderate without thinking of the impact it had on her son, as usual. 

“Do you want me to drive you back home?” he asked, because, clearly, Renjun was in no state to drive.

A shake of the head in answer, bangs sticking to the boy’s forehead. “Can you bring back Jeno, too?” he asked in a small voice. “He can’t drive, and… He offered to be there for me. Is that okay?”

Jaemin stepped closer and carefully pushed a strand of black hair away from his roommate’s eyes. “Yeah, of course, Renjunie. Where is he?”

Renjun pointed to a boy leaning against a wall nearby and seemingly keeping an eye on Renjun. Jaemin nodded. “Do you know where my car is?” he asked, and Renjun nodded. “Can you get to it with Jeno? I’ll be just a second, I have… a situation to take care of.”

“Yeah, I can do that,” Renjun declared, and Jaemin squeezed his shoulder, slipping his car keys in Renjun’s hand before letting him go. He made sure to watch as he joined Jeno, said a few words to him and started making his way towards the car. Jeno bowed his head slightly, wearing a grateful expression on his face as he turned away and wrapped his arm around Renjun to help him walk. 

Jaemin pivoted towards Chenle. “I have to go,” he grimaced.

“I noticed.”

With a sigh, he started turning away, but then a sudden idea hit him and he froze. He gave Chenle a look.

“What?” the green-haired boy asked, shifting impatiently his weight from one feet to another. 

And because he felt bad for leaving the conversation there when so much more could’ve happened between them, because for some self-destructive reason he enjoyed the thrill that bloomed in his blood whenever they spoke too much for his own good, because he was maybe just a tad selfish, Jaemin said, “I wonder if you could win a race with me as copilot.”

Chenle seemed surprised for a fraction of a second before recovering, and a small smirk played on his lips. “I can win with anyone as copilot, Na.”

“Take me aboard in two days and we’ll see about that,” he said before pivoting on his heels and heading towards his parked car, without a last look towards the neon-lit, gleaming with sweat, unfairly pretty face behind him.

But as soon as the conversation ended, all thoughts of Chenle vanished from his mind, and he broke into a near-run to get to his car as fast as possible. Renjun. He slipped into the driver’s seat and shot a look over his shoulder, relieved to see Renjun looked less agitated than before. He was laying across the backseat, his head resting on Jeno’s lap, and the other boy was gently carding his fingers through his black hair. He was in good hands. 

“You okay?” Jaemin asked nevertheless, and when Renjun simply mumbled in answer, not even bothering to open his eyes, he started the engine (though it took multiple tries) and pulled out of the parking lot, craning his neck to look behind the car. 

The drive back to his and Renjun’s apartment was silent, aside from the older boy’s occasional hums of contentment. Jeno was most likely doing a good job with his fingers on Renjun’s scalp. Jaemin made a right, then a left, slowed down, and parked extremely poorly on the curb. Jeno chuckled a bit and Jaemin glared at him as he stepped out of the vehicle. Who was he to talk? He couldn’t even drive.

He opened the back door and braced his hands on the edge of the roof. “Hey, Renjunie,” he whispered. “We’re here. Do you want me to carry you, or…?”

At that, his roommate’s eyes flew open, and even though they were still lined with tears, he shot him a glare. “I can walk by myself, thank you very much.” 

And with a grunt, he pushed himself off of Jeno’s lap and slipped out of the car. Jeno was quick to follow, shutting the door behind him and rushing to slip an arm around Renjun’s waist. Jaemin rolled his eyes. Sure, he could walk, but of course he wouldn’t mind a pretty boy holding him close. 

Jaemin locked the car doors and all three of them made their way to the apartment on the third floor of the complex they lived in. Once inside, Jaemin kicked off his shoes and was about to assist a still very distressed-looking Renjun, but changed his mind when he noticed Jeno helping him already. They were already so domestic… Disgusting.

“Do you want something to eat?” he asked his roommate in a soft voice. “I can make you some ramen if you’re hungry.”

Renjun shook his head. “No, I just… I just want to sleep.”

“That’s fine, Renjunie,” Jaemin assured, then turned to Jeno. “I, uh… I assume you can take care of him?” 

“Yeah, I’ll handle it, don’t worry. Thank you for driving us.” Jeno gave him a grateful smile, and Jaemin smiled right back.

“It’s no problem. The bedroom and bathroom are over there,” he said, and pointed to a hallway stretching to the right. He watched as Jeno walked Renjun into it, finding the bedroom and closing the door behind them.

Jaemin sighed. He knew Jeno would probably stay over to take care of Renjun, which meant… He shot a look to his couch and mumbled a string of curses under his breath. It was either the lumpy couch, or sleeping in the same room as two idiots who he knew were absolutely lovesick and would probably whisper sweet nothings into each other’s ears until late hours of the night. Jaemin honestly preferred the sofa. 

He padded to the kitchen and grabbed from the cabinet a bag of chips, before slumping into a chair in front of the central islet and opening the laptop resting on it. He wiped at his eyes as he browsed for movies to watch, already feeling the post-race fatigue settling in, but not wanting to sleep just yet. He knew if he didn’t distract himself he would dream of a certain green-haired boy and his cocky smile. He chose a movie at random, rummaging through the bag of chips at times, but his attention was elsewhere, and, after half an hour he realized he had absolutely no idea what was happening on his screen. He sighed. It was no use. He shut the laptop and made his way back to the small living room.

Grumbling to himself, he took out a bedsheet, a blanket and a pillow from a drawer and tried to arrange them in an orderly fashion on the sofa. That didn’t work out well, though, so he ended up curled up under the blanket, his head braced on the couch armrest, the pillow and bed sheet crumpled up on the floor. He stared at the ceiling.

His eyelids were being pulled down by sheer exhaustion, but his mind was racing. He was feeling too much right now, it was too overwhelming in the near-silence of his apartment, the rage at the loss he’d experienced, the longing he didn’t want to be there, the strange attraction he felt towards Chenle, all laced with a touch of worry for his best friend and whether Jeno was treating him right. Jaemin shook his head. Now was not the time. He had to rest. He’d figure everything out in the morning, when his thoughts weren’t clouded by the remaining alcohol and adrenaline from earlier. He focused on his breathing, and, slowly, fell into a precarious sleep, chased into his dreams by a green boat and its driver.

-

Two days later, it was race time again.

Jaemin was nervous. He hated it. Hated the knot in the pit of his stomach, the nausea pulling at his gut, the jitters it gave him.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Renjun asked, seated at the kitchen islet, dressed in an oversized grey sweatshirt and basketball shorts, drumming his fingers on his notebook.

“I’ll be fine!” Jaemin breathed, slipping on his leather jacket and hiding his embarrassingly unsteady hands behind his back instead of zipping it up. 

“You’ve never copiloted before, though,” Renjun added pensively.

“It can’t be that hard. You barely do anything when you race with me.”

Renjun let out an outraged gasp. “That’s not true! I help a lot. You just don’t notice. When I slip in a little comment about you being too much towards the right, or the buoy being less visible than usual… That’s copiloting.”

Jaemin hummed in answer, pulling on his shoes.

“Though I have to admit I don’t have to do _as much_ as other copilots, because you’re, well… You’re a great racer.”

Jaemin raised a brow. “I know that, thank you.”

With a scoff, Renjun waved dismissively. “Yeah, well, stop getting so worked up about it. Chenle is good, too, maybe even better, so it means you won’t have to help much, either.”

The pink-haired boy decided to ignore the ‘maybe even better’ part, because he knew that was just Renjun’s friendly teasing. “Will _you_ be okay?” he asked, changing the subject as he walked towards the door, keys clinking in his hand.

Renjun nodded. “Jeno texted me a few minutes ago, he’s on his way. Though I don’t know exactly how long it’ll take him to arrive, since he’s taking the bus.”

With a chuckle, Jaemin shrugged. “Yeah, might take him two hours, as far as we know. Take care of yourself, Renjun,” he added, holding the door open.

“You too, Jaem. Be careful.”

“I always am.” He gave his roommate a wink and shut the door behind him.

He let out a breath. Time to have some fun.

-

The race was in ten minutes, and the place was packed even more than usual. There was music blasting from somewhere near the water, and Jaemin let out a laugh when he recognized _Tokyo Drift_ playing. A good song, but this was speedboat racing, not Fast and Furious. 

He eyed the docks. His Baja was moored a bit farther down, and he could see the bright blue flames gleaming under the neon lights from his spot. But he wouldn’t ride it tonight. His gaze shifted to the green Mastercraft, its sleek hull, its small but powerful build. He frowned.

“Guess who decided to show up,” a voice drawled from behind him, and Jaemin pivoted to find none other than the pilot himself.

“I was the one to suggest it in the first place,” the pink-haired boy replied, irritated.

Chenle smirked. “Suggest what? Assisting me in a race? Yeah, that definitely surprised me.”

With a raised brow, Jaemin crossed his arms over his chest. “And why is that?”

“Because I’d never thought you’d want to help me.”

“I am not helping you,” Jaemin said flatly.

“I don’t need your help, anyways,” Chenle assured, walking towards where his boat was docked. Jaemin followed.

“Then why did you agree to me being copilot?” he asked, and stayed on firm land as Chenle hopped on deck and started prepping the Mastercraft for race.

He shrugged, pushing his green hair out of his face. “So you can _win_ a race on my boat, and know for a fact you don’t stand a chance against me,” he quipped.

“We’ll see about that,” Jaemin said simply, and nodded as Chenle took a seat behind the wheel. “Ready?”

“Yeah, let’s go,” the pilot replied, starting the engine, and Jaemin unmoored the Mastercraft without any difficulty, pushing its nose away and jumping on the rear platform. 

“Not too shabby,” Chenle said, and Jaemin rolled his eyes.

“I’m offended that you think of me so lowly that you don’t think I am capable of _unmooring a boat_.”

Jaemin made his way to the passenger seat but didn’t sit down, instead bracing his arms over the windshield. Then he noticed Chenle’s shoulders shaking with laughter.

“I was trying to compliment you, moron,” the green-haired boy said.

“Oh.”

Chenle pulled at the wheel, his eyes scanning the river, heading slowly towards the starting buoys, where two boats were already waiting. It was still a few minutes to start, but Jaemin felt reassured by being there in advance. 

“Is that all you have to say? Oh?” Chenle asked, and Jaemin was glad he was paying attention to the water and not to him, because there was a light blush dusting his cheeks.

“Yeah. Oh. I’m not impressed,” he lied. Stupid Chenle. The smallest of compliments had him blushing. Jaemin gave himself a finger flick to the forehead.

“You wound me,” Chenle grimaced.

“Too bad,” Jaemin shrugged, and fished for his phone inside his pocket to look at the time. They had nearly five minutes left, and, with a smooth maneuver, Chenle shifted the boat to neutral a few meters from the starting line, soon they were joined by around a dozen other boats.

“If you make me lose,” the pilot started after a few minutes of silence, shooting Jaemin a look, “you’ll regret it.”

Jaemin gave him a smirk in answer. “I thought you could win with _anyone_ as your copilot.”

Chenle’s eyebrows furrowed. “I can. Just… don’t try anything funny.”

Though he didn’t reply, Jaemin’s smile grew. Oh, this would be fun.

“One minute to start,” the boy in the referee boat announced, and the Mastercraft moved forwards slightly, lining up between a plain white Baja and a red-and-yellow Bertram. Jaemin shot Chenle a look. The pilot smirked at him before standing up in front of his seat and focusing his attention to the dark expanse of water reflecting the night sky overhead.

“Thirty seconds.”

Jaemin’s fingers tightened around the end of the windshield, his heartbeat pounding in his ears even if he wasn’t the one racing. He heard Chenle take in a sharp breath. He gave all the racers a quick look, and the look of determination in all of their eyes was enough to make him shiver. It was strange, he thought, 

“Racers ready!” Jaemin inhaled sharply. “Three. Two. One.” 

The horn blew. The mastercraft flew forwards with a roar. Jaemin’s face fell into a confused pout as six boats started in front of the Mastercraft. He shot Chenle a look, but the pilot didn’t seem bothered at all by the fact that half the boats in the race were ahead of him just a few seconds after start. 

“Stop frowning at me,” Chenle shouted over the roar of the engine, and they took the first turn, a bunch of small waves making the boat jump.

“How do you intend on winning this?” Jaemin yelled back. “You’re not even in the top three, jeez.”

Jaemin didn’t hear him sigh, but it was visible in his expression. The green-haired boy’s eyes didn’t leave the course. “I start all my races like this. I know my starts aren’t the best, because my boat’s raw power isn’t that strong. I just have to catch up.”

Jaemin was about to ask what he meant, but he didn’t have to wonder for long, because, with a swift twist of the wheel, Chenle took a turn so close to the buoy Jaemin thought he’d collide with it, cutting past the white Baja they’d been next to at the start.

Jaemin’s jaw was on the floor. That was the quickest, most precise curve he’d ever seen. He was speechless, and stayed so as Chenle passed one boat, then the other. There was only one left in front of them, and the green Mastercraft was closing in dangerously on it. They weren’t even halfway through the course.

“Like what you see?” Chenle asked, and Jaemin snapped out of the stunned state he’d been in. 

“You’re alright, I guess,” he admitted. 

But then he remembered what he’d come on here to do in the first place, and smiled to himself. Chenle wasn’t going to win tonight. He waited for the right moment, and, when Chenle was about to do another one of those inhuman turns to pass the only boat left ahead of them, Jaemin told him, “Careful with the buoy, baby.”

It worked. Chenle took a wide turn instead of curving right next to the red buoy, and the other pilot carried on ahead. Jaemin shot the other boy a look and a satisfied smile stretched his lips when he noticed the deep blush on his cheeks.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, and Chenle blinked, adjusting the boat’s trajectory a bit.

“You can’t just--” he groaned, glaring at the vehicle still ahead of them, and Jaemin raised a questioning eyebrow.

“I can’t just what?”

Chenle shook his head. “Forget it.”

Jaemin sat back and pushed down the grin that was threatening to bloom on his face. 

The race went on, and they were about two hundred meters from the finish line when Chenle, one hand tight on the wheel and the other pressing down the speed lever, started closing in on the first boat again. Jaemin couldn’t let that happen. He crossed over to the driver’s seat, and shrugged when Chenle gave him an incredulous look.

“What. Are. You. Doing.”

Jaemin smiled at him without saying a word, before bringing his hands down on the pilot’s, fingers closing around Chenle’s. They were strangely warm. He pulled the wheel slightly. “You were going too far left,” he said in the other boy’s ear. And, just for good measure, he licked up a stripe of skin on Chenle’s throat before backing away to the passenger’s seat.

“Close your mouth, babe, it’s hanging open,” he quipped, and Chenle snapped out of whatever trance he was in to give him a glare.

But the final turn was coming up, and Chenle was much too distracted to take it properly, let alone use it to come in first, so Jaemin simply reached forwards and twisted the wheel for him. It was sloppy, and he nearly went off-course, but it worked, and they were now in the last straight dash, a few dozen meters behind the finish line, still behind the other boat.

Jaemin gave Chenle the brightest smile he could muster as the boy came in second.

The pilot shifted to neutral gear, turned the boat around, and gave the girl aboard the boat who won a respectful nod. Then, he turned to Jaemin.

“What the _hell_ , Na? he asked, his voice low and his eyes shooting daggers.

The pink haired boy leaned against the windshield, letting the edge of the glass dig into his shoulder. He gave the other his most innocent look. “What’s wrong?”

Chenle’s nostrils flared and he took a step towards the other boy. “ _What's wrong_ ? You just made me _lost the damn race_.”

Jaemin stared at him under lowered lashes. “And what exactly did I do to make you lose?”

He watched as Chenle stuttered a bit, seeing the cogs turn clumsily in his brain, figuring out how embarrassing for him it would be to admit his loss was caused by something so silly. “You--” he hesitated. “You distracted me!”

Jaemin examined his nails. “So I have that much of an effect on you?”

“No! You just--”

“I thought you could win with anyone on board, Zhong,” the boy interrupted him. “Plus, I didn’t do much. If anything, I _helped_ you. I took the last turn for you, remember? You were too stunned to move.”

The pilot’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah, and you almost killed us,” he yelled, taking another step forward . “What the hell was that, anyways? You can’t get that close to the pilot during a race! It’s dangerous!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Jaemin gave a dismissive wave. “We aren’t dead, though so I’d say I did pretty well.”

“You did _terrible_ ,” Chenle exclaimed, pushing him back against the boat’s side. “You’re a _shit_ copilot and you made me lose!”

Jaemin gave him a look, looking down at the boy’s hands fisted in his shirt’s collar. His eyes wandered around the river a little, and he noticed people were watching. He cocked his head. “Oh yeah?” he asked softly.

“Yeah, you stupid--” 

Chenle let out an audible gasp as Jaemin pushed him away and moved to press him into the other side of the Mastercraft, right next to the speed lever. Hard. The green-haired boy winced slightly. “You really need to start meaning what you say,” he whispered in Chenle’s ear and felt the other boy shiver. Oh, it felt good to be the one in control again.

“What?” the pilot uncomfortably pinned against the wall asked weakly.

“You call me names, but I know you want me.”

Chenle took in a sharp breath, then looked up a bit, their eyes meeting. “Don’t flatter yourself,” he whispered, but when Jaemin leaned in slightly, his eyes fluttered shut and his chin jutted forwards slightly. It made the pink-haired boy’s heart jump, just how ready the other boy was for him, how easily he gave up, no matter his cocky and confident front. He felt almost fragile like this, caged between Jaemin’s arms, like he needed to be helped. Jaemin was glad to comply. His eyes shot down to Chenle’s mouth, pink and glossy and _waiting_ for him to close the space between them… Jaemin licked his own lips, leaned in lightly, moved his hand to brace himself better-- and they both nearly toppled to the ground as the boat suddenly lurched forwards.

“What the fuck was that, Na?” Chenle exclaimed after he’d regained his balance, a wince forming on his face as he rubbed at his back. He gave Jaemin a weird look.

The other boy backed away, cheeks ablaze, scratching at the back of his neck. “Uh.” He clicked his tongue, cleared his throat, hating the way his voice was unsteady. Why in the world was he so embarrassed ? This definitely wasn’t like him. “I might have… Accidentally pressed the speed lever while getting closer… And, um… Yeah, sorry.”

Chenle squinted at him for a second, before his laughter rang through the hot night air, and Jaemin hated the way his stomach flipped at the sound. “You’re so clumsy, what the hell?” Jaemin didn’t even get a spare glance as the pilot made sure the sudden movement hadn’t sent them dangerously close to the shore or anything.

The pink-haired boy retreated back to the passenger seat, blocking out the internal screaming, the flashes of the position he’d been in a few seconds earlier. He scoffed. “Oh, come on. That was _one_ time.”

“If you say so,” Chenle said, and smirked at him, but it was awkward and a bit forced. Jaemin cringed internally. Great. Another moment ruined, this time by none other than himself. Chenle cleared his throat, and the other boy ignored the little jump his heart made. “I think we should head back to the docks now.”

Jaemin nodded slowly, noticing only then that they were the last boat left at the finish line, and that all the pilots had already headed back to the after-race party. “Yeah,” he shrugged. “We probably should.”

Silence stretched between them as they ran the course backwards, and Jaemin refused to even spare Chenle a look. His heart was twisted in a knot of emotions he couldn’t identify, and _all_ of them were directed at the green-haired racer. It confused him more than anything, because he’d never… _felt_ so much. It bothered Jaemin as much as it intrigued him, and his impulsive self just wanted to corner Chenle and ask him what the fuck was going on. But nevertheless, that night, he walked off Chenle’s boat without even a glance, unsaid words hanging heavy in the air.

-

A week passed, and Jaemin didn’t see Chenle at all.

“Why are you avoiding him?” Renjun asked, chewing on a granola bar, sprawled over the couch.

“I’m not,” Jaemin replied, and rolled over on the carpet he was laying on.

“You are. You’ve never skipped a race in your _life_ and you missed _two_ of them this week. What happened?”

Jaemin let out a groan and folded his elbow over his face, covering his eyes. “Nothing. Nothing happened.”

Renjun rolled his eyes and reached for a pillow that thumped as it collided with Jaemin’s chest. “I know that’s a lie. Spill it, fucker.”

With an exaggerated sigh, the pink-haired boy pushed himself upwards into a sitting position. “I’m confused.”

“Um. You’re gonna have to elaborate on that, Jaem,” Renjun deadpanned, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Okay, well.” Jaemin hesitated. “We almost kissed. Twice.”

“O… kay? Anything more?”

“Ugh.” He let himself fall back on the rug, back hitting the floor with a dull sound. “I don’t know. He makes me… _feel_ stuff.”

_That_ grabbed Renjun’s attention. He sat up straighter, and there was suddenly a mischievous glint in his eyes. “ _Oh_? You have feelings for him?”

“I mean I _think_ I do.” Jaemin scoffed as Renjun gasped audibly. “Don’t get too excited. I didn’t mean _those_ kinds of feelings. I just meant I experience a ton of different emotions, all very confusing, towards him, and that annoys me because I’ve never felt anything like that for anyone.”

His roommate raised an eyebrow suggestively. “And what emotions are those?”

With a roll of his eyes and a shrug, Jaemin brought his hands behind his head. “Fuck, if I know. Anger. Lots of anger. Mostly anger, actually. Bitterness. Jealousy. Maybe a bit of awe. And… I guess…” he trailed off a bit, before mumbling, “I guess I _am_ a little attracted to him.”

Renjun’s eyes narrowed. “Like you hate him but want to kiss his face off?”

Without thinking, Jaemin nodded in answer. “Yeah, exac-- No! No, I don’t want to kiss him, of course not!” 

That was a blatant lie. Renjun knew it too. “Now that’s just bullshit. How about you stop being in denial? Maybe that’ll help.”

“ _Fine_ ,” Jaemin snapped. “Fine! No denial then. He’s pretty. Sometimes. And I want to kiss him. A lot. And hold his hand, maybe, and take him on a date and-- Oh. Oh no.”

Renjun clicked his tongue. “Well, that was quicker than I expected. Congrats! You are now aware of your feelings.The question is now, what are you going to do about them?”

“Nothing. I will shut my trap about them because they are _stupid_ ,” Jaemin shrugged. “Zhong hates me, anyways.”

With a drawn-out sigh, like a parent tired of their child being unreasonable, Renjun gave his roommate a glare. “See, that is what you will _not_ do.”

“Who’s going to stop me?”

“Me.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

“Jaemin.” Renjun shifted from his seated position to hunch over Jaemin, looking him straight in the eyes. “You’re going to the race tonight, and you’re doing something about the Chenle situation. I’m sick of seeing you moping around the apartment when you could be out there with your boat. Now _go_.”

Jaemin huffed. Stayed quiet for a long minute. Then got up and started walking towards the bedroom. “I hate you,” he said over his shoulder, and Renjun gave him a bright smile.

“Love you, too. Your leather jacket is on the desk chair.”

“You’re coming too, you know?” Jaemin shouted from the room, slipping on his jacket. “I need my copilot.”

“Oh, I am. Give me a second, though. I need to process my victory.”

“You’re insufferable.”

“I am aware. Let’s go win this race.”

-

To say Jaemin was nervous was an understatement.

He’d figured out he had feelings-- _feelings_ \--for Chenle barely an hour ago and now he was about to race against him. Now that it was official--in his mind, at least--it scared him so much more, and honestly at this point he was wondering if he was going to pass out. He thought it stupid that stuff like this made him so incapable and unsure. How stupid that he lost all his bearings because of that green-haired moron.

He was staring at him now, in fact, as Chenle stood besides his boat, immersed in a deep conversation with his copilot, Yangyang. Jaemin had to _do_ something. He was aching to say a word, a sentence, _anything_ that would make Chenle notice him. He hated the uncertainty his feelings put him in, he wanted clarity, and fast. He’d never been one to keep things unexplained.

It was still ten minutes to start. He had time.

Jaemin inhaled sharply through his nose, clenched his fists, and started walking towards Chenle.

What he was going to tell him? Oh, he had absolutely no idea. He just had this visceral need to clear the fog that was obscuring things between him and the other boy. Before he realized it, he was standing in front of the green-haired pilot, faced with a suddenly overwhelming beauty that made his mind go completely blank.

“Na,” Chenle greeted him.

Jaemin opened his mouth, closed it. His brain had short-circuited, he guessed, because his mind was completely silent, and he stayed there, standing like an idiot.

Chenle tilted his head. “Did you want something, or…?”

The pink-haired boy snapped out of it, he was barely aware of what he was doing and he felt as though his body were moving on its own. “Yeah,” he said, and grabbed Chenle’s face between his palms, bringing their lips together.

It was warm and soft and it literally knocked the breath out of him. It felt so _right_ , Jaemin wanted to keep on kissing him forever. But he backed away slowly, his hands falling to his sides, a satisfied feeling blooming in his chest when he saw the bright red adorning the other boy’s face. 

“Good luck,” Jaemin told him, managing to sound calm and collected, before turning away and walking towards his own boat. His heartbeat was drowning out every other sound and he felt like he was about to overheat but he only gave Renjun, who was already waiting at the right dock, a tight nod. 

“I saw that,” Renjun teased as Jaemin hopped aboard his boat. “Are you sure that was a wise thing to do right before a race? Won’t it make you lose your cool?”

Jaemin took in a long breath through his nose and let his gaze drift to the expanse of dark water. There was a warmth in his chest and a lightness to his feet, that he would deal with later. Now, it was race time, and he couldn't allow anything to disturb his mindset. He just hoped Chenle wasn’t as good as shutting out unwanted thoughts as he was. 

“I’ll be fine. Undo the knots,” he told Renjun, and soon they were off, with only five minutes left to the starting horn.

-

Chenle did not feel good about this race.

Not only was the wind a bit too strong to his liking and the waves a little too high, he found out quick enough that he wasn’t in shape to focus on anything. As soon as he tried to keep his thoughts on something specific, they drifted away, out of his control, and soon the only thing in his mind was the feeling of Jaemin’s lips against his.

He tightened his hands around the wheel, the frown on his face deepening as time ticked by. One minute to start. “Damn you, Na,” he muttered. 

Thirty seconds.

“Focus,” Chenle ordered himself, earning a worried look from his copilot. _Focus_. But that was easier said than done. Once again, there was the memory of soft hands on his face, and he felt his cheeks heating up again.

“Racers ready,” a voice said from the referee boat, and Chenle jumped a bit because he most definitely _wasn't_ ready. “Three... Two... One.”

Chenle knew it the second he pressed down on the speed lever a bit too late, his start even worse than usual. Tonight was not his night. And it was all because of a certain pink-haired racer, seemingly unbothered as his boat carried on ahead of everyone.

But Chenle gritted his teeth and narrowed his eyes, not giving up quite yet. He might’ve been distracted, but that didn’t mean he’d allow himself to lose without putting up a fight. 

“I’m coming for you, Na.”

-

Jaemin won.

It was a given--his tactic had worked. It technically hadn’t been a _tactic_ per se in the first place, but it did work as one, so Jaemin simply took the opportunity. 

“Nice,” Renjun said as a simple way of congratulating him, and Jaemin grinned.

“I finally put him back in his place,” he declared, and Renjun shrugged.

“Yeah, well, that doesn’t change the fact that you still have stuff to figure out with him.”

Jaemin pouted. “Oh, come on. Let me enjoy my sweet, sweet victory. I worked hard for it.” Renjun scoffed, which Jaemin chose to ignore. “I’ll… talk to him later. Maybe.”

Renjun replied in a flat tone, but Jaemin didn’t hear a word of what he said, because he twisted a bit and met a gaze that felt like it was going to burn right through his skin. Chenle was glaring at him, eyebrows furrowed in an expression Jaemin couldn’t quite describe, if only for the fact that it confused him, because Chenle was looking at him like he absolutely hated him, but also like he _wanted_ him. The pink-haired racer just gave him a smug grin, accompanied by an eyebrow raise, and turned away before he could see the other boy’s reaction.

He sighed in pleasure as he maneuvered his boat with a distracted hand. Oh, how it felt nice to be the one on top of the situation once again. Though, he had to admit, the feeling of losing control that seemed to cling to him quite often when he interacted with Chenle was somewhat thrilling. It set his blood on fire, filled his veins with adrenaline. Made him want more. But still, it was a comforting familiarity to be the one in control, so he headed back to the docks that night mostly satisfied.

_Mostly_ satisfied, because Renjun had been right. He had some shit to handle with Chenle. Those _feelings_ he had for the racer, no matter how conflicted they were… He had to get them out. It wasn’t like him to keep stuff that bothered him inside, let it simmer until it exploded. No, he was more the type to yell _fuck it_ and blurt everything out, no matter the outcome.

Luckily, he didn’t have to make much of an effort, because Chenle came over to see him first. Jaemin was still sitting in his boat while it was docked, checking up on some stuff before covering it up for the night. 

“Good evening,” Jaemin said, closing the compartment beneath the back seat, as Chenle crossed his arms, cocking his head to the side.

“You made me lose again.”

Jaemin raised an eyebrow at him, dropping to a kneeling position on the back seat he’d just closed. “Just because of a kiss? Am I really that good?”

“No.”

With an over-the-top grimace, Jaemin brought a hand to his heart, before getting up and jumping right over the side of the boat to stand on the dock in front of the other boy. “Ouch, my feelings.”

“You’ll survive.” Chenle shamelessly checked out Jaemin, his eyes swooping up and down, once, twice. Jaemin fought back the blush that was forming on his cheeks. “So, are you going to take me for a ride?”

Jaemin’s eyebrow shot up in pleasant surprise. “Oh, is that why you came here? You wanna see what my baby can do? Not too bitter over your defeat?”

“Oh, don’t worry, I am. Doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate a quality vehicle like yours. Plus, you’ve been aboard mine, so I think it’s time you return the favour.”

“Is that so?” Jaemin gave him a mocking bow, indicating the boat with his arm. “Hop on aboard then, sir.”

He didn’t have to ask twice, and Chenle made his way on deck, taking a seat behind the wheel. Jaemin felt a bubble of pride swell in his chest as the other boy let his hands fly over the speed lever, the dashboard, the windshield, with an appreciative look in his eyes. “Do you think you can take off?” Jaemin asked, and the green-haired pilot scoffed.

“I can take off in any boat. You, take care of the moorings.”

“As you wish,” Jaemin quipped, smirking. He untied the ropes connecting the boat to the docks with one hand, threw them onboard, and instead of jumping on the back platform as usual, he jumped over the side of the boat to hop onto the sundeck up front, landing on the left-side bench.

“You really couldn’t have gotten on like a normal person?” Chenle asked, steering the wheel so that the nose of the boat would turn away from the docks. 

“Nope.” Jaemin pushed himself up and headed through the thin door separating the front and back of the boat. “Hand over the wheel, babe.”

Chenle rolled his eyes, but scooted away from the driver’s seat nevertheless. He knew it had already taken a fair amount of trust for Jaemin to let him take off his boat, so he wouldn’t push it. Jaemin pressed down on the speed lever and the engine’s soft rumbling loudened slightly, punctuated by the sound of water crashing into the hull.

“Where are we going?” Chenle inquired, and the other boy shrugged.

“I have no idea.”

They conversed a bit as Jaemin led them who-knows-where, the evening wind hitting their cheeks and blowing their hair out of their faces. They rode on like this, making small talk as the white Baja cleaved through the dark water. Then the river widened into a small bay, which Jaemin decided was a good spot, so he stopped his engine smack in the middle of the expanse of water.

“What are we doing here?” Chenle asked.

“We are stargazing.” Jaemin flopped down on the right-side bench of the sundeck and saw Chenle shrugging in his peripheral vision.

“Sure. Do you have anything to drink?”

Jaemin pointed to the compartment under the dashboard. “Always. There’s a cooler in there.”

His eyes stayed turned to the sky, but he heard Chenle fumble for the ice box, then the dull clinking of ice as he rummaged through it for drinks. 

“What do you want?”

“Anything,” Jaemin replied, and soon there was a cold can slipping into his hand. He gave the other racer a thankful nod and pushed himself upwards into a sitting position. His drink fizzed when he opened it, carbonated bubbles spilling over the side. 

“Stargazing is fine,” Chenle started after taking a long gulp of his own drink, “but I think this is missing a little bit of atmosphere.” He stood back up and made his way to the dashboard, pulling out his phone from his pocket and fiddling with a few wires before connecting them.

“I hope you like Led Zeppelin,” Chenle said, and Jaemin fought back a grin as a loud guitar riff started blaring from the speakers embedded in the sides of the Baja.

“I see you’re a man of taste,” the other boy stated, sipping on the fruity liquid inside the can he was holding. 

They talked for a bit, drank a little, joked around, and soon Chenle was standing on the bench, headbanging as he showed Jaemin the most intense air-guitar solo he’d ever seen. The pink-haired racer laughed, a warm feeling blooming in his chest, the alcohol he’d consumed clouding his senses in the most exquisite way. He was dancing, too, dimly aware of his clumsiness as he stumbled around the sundeck, twisting and jumping around, giving in to the music. There were flames in his veins and they flared up even stronger whenever his eyes met Chenle’s, his whole body shivering with the thrill. It felt like pure ecstasy. Being completely alone, in the middle of the bay, dancing with the green-haired boy like no one was watching. He felt free.

They jumped around to a particularly upbeat song, and Jaemin let out a whoop, adrenaline flowing through his body, and twirled around with a big smile on his face. He had to take a small pause after that, because his head had started spinning. He let himself fall down on the cushioned bench to take a few breaths, and his eyes went to Chenle, who was still dancing, unbothered. He looked so beautiful like this, Jaemin thought, his clothes and hair messed up because of the intense movement, droplets of sweat running down his cheekbones. 

Chenle noticed he was being stared at, though, and paused his dancing to glare at Jaemin. “What is it?” he asked over the loud music.

Jaemin, as if in a trance, didn’t reply. He got up and crossed the sundeck with a few steps, not without stumbling a little, and suddenly he was standing right in front of Chenle. The other boy was breathing harshly, and Jaemin slowly brought up a hand to cup his cheek.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispered, because, even in his drunken state, he wouldn’t have wanted to force himself on Chenle in any way.

“No,” Chenle said, and Jaemin was ready to pull away, but suddenly there were two hands on his hip bones, pulling him close. “I’m the one who takes care of that.”

Heat flooded to Jaemin’s already-red cheeks as he chuckled. “You’re ridiculous.”

And, in answer, Chenle kissed him.

His lips tasted like alcohol and sugar. Jaemin wanted more of it. He slipped a hand through the other boy’s green locks as their lips moved together, pulling their faces even closer. Chenle’s tongue ran along his and his thumbs traced circles over his hips and Jaemin was _burnning_ , every inch of him threatening to catch on fire with a simple touch from the other racer. 

But soon Chenle was pulling away, and Jaemin gasped at the sudden cold. The green-haired boy gave him a smile, his pink lips still gleaming with droplets of saliva. “That’s my favourite song,” he said, and Jaemin could do nothing but join him as he started dancing again.

He and Chenle danced like madmen, with the occasional kiss between two moves, until both of them were exhausted. They both flopped down onto the front seats again, gazing up at the cloudless night sky, out of breath, their faces gleaming with sweat. 

“So,” Jaemin started between pants, but didn’t add anything else, because there wasn’t really much to say.

“So,” Chenle replied, like it was some sort of answer. They fell quiet after that, and listened to the soft sound of waves lapping over the hull, rocking the boat lightly.

It was strangely peaceful, and Jaemin let out a long breath through his nose, closing his eyes for a bit. Just a bit.

“I still hate you,” he heard Chenle mumble.

Jaemin didn’t say anything, just reached out blindly to his side, until he grabbed at the other boy’s arm, and he let his hand run alongside it until he reached Chenle’s hand. “Shut up,” he grumbled in answer, and, through the sleepy fog that had started clouding his brain, he laced his fingers through Chenle’s.

And like this, holding hands under the stars, they let the steady rhythm of the waves rock them to sleep.

-

Jaemin awoke with a pounding headache and a hard, rough surface pressed against his cheek.

His first thought was that Chenle wasn’t holding his hand anymore, and his second was that he hadn’t laid anchor yesterday night.

That was all it took for him to scramble up to a standing position, panicked eyes analyzing his surroundings, realizing in the process that he’d fallen on the floor between the two front seats overnight. 

His heartbeat calmed a bit when he saw that they hadn’t drifted off anywhere worrying while they were sleeping, and the Baja was thankfully still situated at a safe distance from land, if only a few dozen meters from where they’d first stopped. He let out a relieved breath, and pivoted to see Chenle curled up on the right-side bench, clutching a rope like it was a stuffed animal. Jaemin smiled fondly for a second, before leaning in and poking at the other boy’s cheek. “Good morning.”

Chenle let out a groan and tried to turn the other way, except the narrow seat didn’t leave much room for rolling around, and so he nearly fell to the floor. “‘m tired.”

“I can see that, but we have to get back soon. It’s…” Jaemin checked his watch. “Eight o’clock already.”

With another reluctant grumble, Chenle managed to raise himself to a sitting position. He rubbed at his eyes, and Jaemin thought that was the most adorable thing he’d ever seen, with his green hair pointing in every direction, his cheeks dusted with the faintest natural blush, a trail of dried drool running down his chin. 

Jaemin took in a sharp breath. It was time. 

“Also, before we head back…” he cleared his throat, and Chenle seemed to have picked up on his sudden embarrassment, because all of a sudden he looked more awake, his eyes narrowing in curiosity. “I have something I need to talk to you about.”

“Oh?” Chenle asked, crossing his arms over his chest and raising an intrigued eyebrow.

“Okay, let me just get this out. Don’t laugh. Don’t interrupt me. Okay?”

The green-haired boy nodded.

“So, you’re a piece of shit.” Chenle scoffed, but didn’t add anything. “I mean, you strolled in here with your pretty face and your sick boat and started beating the shit out of me. You stole my place, basically, and that’s why I still want to punch you, sometimes. But-- no, don’t say anything! I’m not done. I’m supposed to hate you for all of this, right? But, here’s the thing.” Jaemin looked down and fiddled with the wrinkled fabric of his pants for a second. “I don’t.”

“Oh, I see where this is going,” Chenle interrupted with a smug smile, his cheeks reddening, but Jaemin shushed him.

“I _said_ , let me speak. It was childish of me to stay mad at you for something that depended on talent only. You’re better than me at racing right now. Instead of taking that fact and crying about it, I should’ve taken it as a way to improve.” Jaemin was surprised at his own maturity, but he didn’t let it show. He continued on, “I should’ve acted like a grown adult instead of holding a grudge. Once I was able to look past that, it made me realize stuff. You-- Look, you’re attractive. It’s no secret, I’m sure you know already that you’re pretty. But that’s not the only thing.” Jaemin sighed, chewed on his lower lip. “You’re funny, and smart, and sweet, and you make my heart race sometimes. It makes me angry, but there’s nothing I can do about it.” A sharp exhale. “There. I said it. Do what you will with the information.”

Chenle’s eyes narrowed. “Can I speak now?”

Jaemin ignored the heat radiating from his face and waved dismissively. “Yeah, sure.”

“Are you saying you have feelings for me, Na?” There was a glint in his eyes and that infuriating grin on his face again. Jaemin rolled his eyes, even though his traitorous blush deepened.

“Maybe.”

“Well. I have to say I’m flattered. All those compliments took me by surprise, you know?” 

Oh, he was enjoying himself. Making the suspense last. Jaemin glared at him. “Out with it. I don’t have all day.”

Chenle lifted his palms in the air, feigning innocence. “Alright, alright. You want the truth?”

Jaemin nodded. He tried to look absolutely unbothered, but his heart was racing. It’s not like he wasn’t expecting a rejection. He’d prepared himself for that possible outcome. He’d known the risks of confessing before he did it. He’d just needed to get the feelings out in the open.

Chenle sighed. “Okay. I like you, Na.” Jaemin’s heart jumped in his chest, but he kept a straight face. “I like you more than I should. And, just like you, I _hate_ that fact, but it really can’t be helped. Your sudden maturity over the grudge thing just made you ten times more attractive than you already were, and that’s infuriating, because you were _already_ a ten.” Chenle looked away. “Shit, I’m rambling. But I think you got the point.”

Jaemin bit his lip to hide the wide smile that was threatening to stretch his lips and give away the euphoria he was feeling at the moment. “Yeah,” he said. “I do.”

There was a beat of silence, before Chenle asked tentatively, “So… now what?”

Jaemin smiled, leaned forwards, pecked the other boy on the lips. Then he stood up and padded to the driver’s seat. The engine started with a roar and he shot Chenle, whose face was bright red, a grin. “Now we head back.”

-

“Where are you going?” Renjun asked Jaemin a week, a date, a bunch of boat rides under the stars and a good few kisses later. “The race starts in five minutes.”

“I’m going to see Chenle,” Jaemin shot back, and rolled his eyes as his copilot fake-gagged exaggeratedly. 

He made his way to the dock where the bright green Mastercraft was moored and, just as he’d expected, Chenle hadn’t left yet. He was still conversing with his copilot a few feet from his boat, and said copilot wisely decided to walk away when he saw Jaemin stride closer.

“Hey,” Jaemin said.

“Hey.”

“Good luck tonight.”

“You too, baby,” Chenle replied, then he frowned. “Was there a particular reason why you came to see me four minutes before the start?”

Jaemin smirked and stalked closer, bracing his palm under the other boy’s chin, then giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Can’t I pay my boyfriend a visit before our race?”

Chenle froze. “Your _what_?”

But Jaemin was already walking a way, blowing the green-haired racer a kiss over his shoulder.

“Hurry up, Jaem, we’ve only got two minutes,” Renjun told him as he hopped on the boat, barely able to hide his smile.

  
“I know, I know. Let’s win this thing,” he told his copilot as he unmoored the Baja.

And they did. Chenle crossed the finish line a few meters behind them, and Jaemin bit down his grin when he noticed the mix of panic and confusion in the other racer’s eyes. Oh, he’d pulled a number on him. If he couldn’t win with his boat alone, then he’d find a new way to throw Chenle off before each race.

Once his boat was back at the docks, he hopped off, whistling to himself, proud of his little trick. There was a small part of him that was worried Chenle would reject him, but he ignored it. “Hi again,” he exclaimed, and a green head whipped around to meet him.

“What the fuck?”

Jaemin pretended to be surprised. “What?”

Chenle glared at him, and the pink-haired boy’s grin just widened. “You are infuriating.”

“Yeah, but I just beat you.”

“You made me lose!” An eye roll. “Again! Also… Don’t you have to _ask_ before calling someone your… uh… your b--”

“Come on, baby, you can say it,” Jaemin teased, tilting his head to the side. “ _Boyfriend_.”

Chenle’s cheeks turned bright red so quickly it was almost comical. “Yeah, that. Isn’t it supposed to be a two-people agreement?”

Jaemin winced a bit, but shrugged. “Oh, if you don’t want to be my boyfriend, that’s your choice, of course. I don’t want to put pressure on you. I just needed to surprise you for my tactic to work.”

Chenle’s face morphed into the most annoyed expression Jaemin had ever seen on anyone. “Of course I want to be your boyfriend, dummy. I would just enjoy you asking me out properly.”

The pink-haired racer’s eyes widened. “Oh.” Then, with a smirk, he grabbed Chenle’s hand and placed a kiss atop it. “Will you be my boyfriend, stupid head?”

Chenle’s laughter was like music to his ears. “Yeah, I’ll be your boyfriend, dumbass.”

And when Jaemin kissed him, their teeth clashed together because he couldn’t stop smiling. As they stayed like that, arms around each other, waves sloshing close by, it felt like they were the only two people in the world, and Jaemin thought that maybe he wouldn’t mind losing if the reward was Chenle.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!!! please don't hesitate to leave kudos/comments if you liked it (and if you want to), they make my day :)
> 
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